On Rejection

August 07, 2012

I receive rejection letters for Creation predominantly in the morning. I am not a morning person, and I often start my day somewhat depressed. This is the time where I pull myself out of bed, blindly stumble around the room to get dressed, and see that I have another response from an agent sitting in my inbox. At first, a little tingle of excitement rushed over me with the possibility that perhaps this is the one agent who believes in me and sees something in my work. After about ten rejection letters, this optimism slithered away into some dark hole of pity. Rejection prefers to kick you when you're  already down.

I dread the form responses, the little jabs of not good enough and not what we're looking for. I particularly dread them in the morning, because when I receive them in the morning, the funk I woke up with lingers far beyond my morning bowl of breakfast. Self-doubt eats at me like acid, and it makes me, through and through, a sour person.

I haven't worked on my novels in weeks. I am discouraged. I am tired. I am going through personal struggles, and I receive too many rejection letters in the mornings.

Therefore, it is time for me to start waking up at noon.

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